Aruna Week 12 - The Usage of Power
Many believe that the greatest pitfall of holding power is the risk of corruption. We are afraid to react to power by abusing it for our own ends, whether for concrete personal interests or merely for a power trip. But I would argue that there’s another mistake people commonly make with power—a tendency of humans that we don’t discuss enough—and that’s the failure to recognize that we have power in the first place.
Power is simply the ability to make choices in a way that matters. We often associate power with politics, social influence, physical strength—ways in which people can impact other people. But all of us can make choices. Everyone has power, at least over their own lives.
For me, the past couple months have been defined by a great deal of academic burnout. This is the “I haven’t checked Aeries since the beginning of January, why do you ask?” kind of burnout. Yes, that bad. The loss of motivation, the constant decrease in motivation, the procrastination—I’m sure you are familiar.
This was up until POAS. I made progress while reaching for the early deadline, but gave up. I didn’t touch that Google Doc until Monday night before regular submission. After a thoroughly unproductive long weekend, that night, I reworked a confused outline until it became less confused. From then to 9:57 P.M. Thursday night, POAS went from less than half complete to... somehow, done!
I bring this up because I remember feeling powerful afterward. This feeling wasn’t about the paper itself; it was the decision to put effort into something and bring it to fruition. If I could do this, I could do anything. And thus, the academic burnout has begun to end.
This might be a lame anecdote for discussing power. But I find that in my life, my darkest times were when I perceived myself not to have power, when I believed that other people or forces held sway over me. Often, there’s not even an external force to blame; I just don’t feel in control of my own actions. I can’t manage my time; I will waste it anyway. But that’s not true unless I allow it to be.
Hi Aruna! I had fun reading your blog and the way you described feeling burned out or unmotivated to do things really reminded me of myself. I thought it was really nice how you started off your blog by reminding us that power doesn’t simply mean wealth or status and that it is something everyone has even if it is in small amounts. We often overlook our ability to control ourselves and do something we need to even if we don’t want to. I know and have been told many times that it is often this first step is hardest but proves to be fruitful afterwards. Most of all, I really enjoyed how relatable your blog is since things such as procrastination are also something that I am a little too familiar with. I completely agree with you that there is an undeniable feeling of power which follows doing simple tasks just like completing a long assignment. I believe that this is because we enjoy realizing the idea that we have power over ourselves and have done something we need to rather than give into laziness. I also believe that this is something which can be honed and shape us to be better and more productive if we are careful about it. I hope I get to work with you more this school year!
ReplyDeleteHi Aruna! I am so excited to be writing a comment for you, as I have loved reading your blogs but could never quite find the words to share my appreciation for them. Although, my flight-or-fight instinct kicked in upon opening your blog and seeing the word ‘POAS.’ I wholeheartedly agree with your statement on the individual power people have. I wrote my blog about a similar concept, and I find the idea of free will fascinating. The way that by simply making your mind up and deciding to do something, you can just do it. The amount of power that everyone in the world holds without realizing it is intriguing, this is what leads people to climb to the top or fall to the bottom. I can also definitely relate to your academic burnout—that chill of opening Aeries praying that my grades had gone up rather than down, the crushing feeling of finding that I performed terribly on an exam I was confident on, the sleepless nights of staring at an assignment unable to move my fingers or feel any cogs shifting in my mind. Your personal experience with your POAS is incredibly inspirational. I went through a similar process, giving up on early deadline, dreading opening my doc, and eventually getting POAS outlined and written the week of. However, what is so inspirational about your story is the power you felt afterward. I think it is amazing how getting this one big task off of your radar ended your burnout and empowered you to feel such a way. I don’t think your anecdote is lame at all, rather, reading about your success journey has motivated me to work harder. I find that my academic burnout has gotten worse after finishing my POAS paper instead of getting better, and that the workload just continues to pile up. I find myself uncontrollably napping more, spending all night long crying over an assignment that I could easily finish if I really focused and procrastinating on big projects I should get over with. Reading your blog has definitely changed my mindset and has encouraged me to work towards that feeling of power and accomplishment you felt not so long ago. This was such a powerful blog to end off our unit of ‘power and language’ on, and I am happy you wrote it. Thank you for sharing, Aruna!
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